The nuclear family is now the most common unit, especially in the cities, but sons are still expected to care for their ageing parents. Because of the Confucian emphasis on family hierarchies, detailed genealogies are kept. These go back centuries and include a person’s birth, relations, achievements, and place of burial. At clan gatherings, the higher a family is ranked in the genealogy, the more respect it is shown.

Diet and Eating

Metal chopsticks and spoons are the most commonly used utensils. At a dinner party, the meal usually precedes the socializing. Items are passed and drinks are poured with the right hand, with the left hand supporting the forearm or wrist. When holding a glass to receive a drink, it is polite to use both hands. Eating whilst walking on the street is not appropriate for adults.

Socializing

The use of someone’s title shows respect. Foreign visitors should always address people formally unless asked to do otherwise. A common greeting is Annyong haseyo?, which means “Are you at peace?” Young children often greet each other with a simple Annyong? To show special respect, an honorific is added to the greeting: Annyong hashimnikka? Young children bow or nod when greeting adults.

It is not unusual to see South Korean men (usually younger) holding hands or walking with a hand on a friend’s shoulder. Touching older people or members of the opposite sex, however, is usually not appropriate. Personal space is limited in South Korea, so people generally do not form queues, and pushing and crowding are considered normal—for example, everyone may crowd around and push to enter a bus.

Guests invited to a home remove their shoes upon entering. Whilst European-style furniture is common, in traditional Korean homes guests are seated on cushions on ondol floors that are heated from below. Men sit cross-legged and women tuck their legs to one side behind them. The guest receives the warmest or best position. Guests invited for a meal or party customarily bring a small gift in appreciation, often something that can be served at the gathering. Wrapped gifts are not opened in front of the giver. Refreshments are usually served, and it is impolite to refuse them.

Recreation

Holidays and Celebrations

On a person's 60th birthday, members of the extended family gather for a grand celebration, called Hwan'gap, for which they may have saved for years. New members of the family are also celebrated. One hundred days after a child's birth, a small feast is held in honour of the child's survival because in the past many children died in infancy. A much larger celebration, called Tol, is held at the first birthday. Of the gifts offered, whichever one that a child first picks up is thought to signal his or her fortunes in life.